just set them up, to knock them down.

Sometimes I wish...

2011-08-25T23:39:00.000-07:00

You knew.

when will the fruit be ready?

2010-01-21T01:00:00.000-08:00

as i have told others, the past year has been one hell of a ride. THERE WERE IMMENSE AMOUNTS NEGATIVE EVENTS THAT TOOK PLACE THROUGHOUT IT'S COURSE, yet i've had the most positive outlooks on every situation. the potholes and bumps in the road were always in fluctuation and it was extremely difficult to find that plateau. SO many things have occurred since i've last blogged, but i don't think it's necessary to ramble on about the things that have already passed on here. there were some harsh times and then there were great times. not matter what happened though, i made sure i knew that the memories i have made and shared with others are imprinted in my mind and heart.

i've become this new person.

someone who i am still a stranger to at times, i have not let down even my own guard to myself. i told myself i will try my best to be patient in learning and adapting to what i really want and do what i need to become the ethically moral person i would like to see in the future.

a few times i was blinded by the demons i had inside of me, that were too overwhelming to face alone. alcohol was my best friend in 2009. now it's 2010 and even though it's been only 3 weeks into the year, i think i'm becoming my own best friend. understanding myself more and being in control of the life i want to lead and not by an influence of something deameaning. i was very disappointed a few time in myself several times throughout the year. things that would make my nights sleepless. i hope to let go of mistakes slowly becoming the past so that i do not let them affect me in the future.

no, this is not an emotional post.

i'm inspired, encouraged, and enlightened from my recent encounters with the beauty in this world that surrounds us everyday. the little things most people take for granted.

i know i'm not perfect, and i don't expect anyone else to be either.

it's really the thoughts and actions together that mean something.

happenings/thoughts;

spring semester is going to be full of new experiences, things that i've always wanted to be a part of. the classes and professors i have are great, AASA's business semester, and the more pride i have being at UCO day by day.
volunteered for the first time this year! :)
haiti recently had a tragic and disastrous earthquake which makes me thankful for what i have and how i have so much to give to them and therefore i should do what i can, even if it's little, to help. - i tried to get over the embarrassment of speaking in front of AASA members at our first general meeting to donate change to the haiti relief by the red cross and managed to get almost $60! every step will be important to help, especially in a time like this right?
i PRAY PRAY PRAY and work on being better with time management.
helped aaron barney with an ONA photoshoot. (even though i was totally unprepared.)
i've been ridiculously inspired to do/have artlike hobbies? sounds lame because everyone thinks a form of art is just about making paintings and drawing but no, i mean the things that keeps our world going.
tattoos... tattoos... piercings.. and more tattoos.

WELL TOODLES, i'm going to retire from this post now. see ya!

p.s. make donations to the american red cross please! whether it's online, at school, or through the phone. just do it. ---> http://www.redcross.org

what there is to life; that moment only happens once.

2009-08-03T00:56:00.000-07:00

so i know lately, i've been making decisions on what makes others happy. (not that i ever succeeded, but i attempted.)
well this weekend, i did my best to make myself happy.
i took a road trip with a good friend and others to dallas and austin, basically doing things that i have not done before and going to places i have not been to.
i just felt so freaking good!
i was not expecting much from this experience, but i learned not only much about others but also myself.

bar hopping was the shit.
ikea was love.
10 people in one hotel room sharing one bathroom was different.
attempting to converse with andy and wing.
having horrible aim at taking pictures.
tipping 100% at the bar!
too much to even type out. X)

:) i admire many others for not only their accomplishments but also their perspectives.

i'm never going to be sick of hearing "that's what she said", "scissoring", "sweat brothers", "it's so hot", "$1 shots", and ridiculous amounts of perverse connotations.

fuck yes. thank you bobby.

just a reminder.

2009-07-16T23:50:00.001-07:00

i need one everyday to make sure i don't lose myself.
i may have been a contradiction, but who are you to say?
i may have been a little lost, but i still have hope everyday that i'll eventually be either..

grateful for what i have already,
or just be damn content with what i've managed to get.

does that make sense?
maybe? maybe not?

... there are so many questions to ask everyday and sometimes it just get overwhelming.
i just don't know where to start and where to end.

it feels like sky's the limit.

today, i updated my twitter to :

Drinking grapefruit juice out of the carton. It tastes like life. Just bitter.

sometimes it's just easier to tell a lie.

2009-07-12T17:09:00.000-07:00

sometimes it's hard for me to just be honest.